On Turning Twenty-two

I remember when I was a kid, I've always wanted to grow up fast so I can do all things adult. Work and earn money, go out on Fridays nights, attend parties till the break of dawn, travel, meet new people, understand other cultures and whatever the world has to offer.

Now I am here, but it seemed like time flew too fast I wasn't prepared yet. There were many times when I felt I was a disappointment--- to myself, my family, my friends, everyone. I've done things I am not proud of and made too much bad choices. The feeling was so bad I just want to pop like a bubble or be blown like dust in the wind and be gone forever. I was so down and alone. And I thought no one understood me. Likewise, a lot of people had tried to bring me down. Before, I get really affected to what people thought of me, so I tried to fit in. I got depressed for hundreds of times when I failed or get rejected. Good thing I was in control of myself and never thought of doing suicide. Only, I grew quieter and I chose to spend time alone than with others. I never asked questions. I never argued. I just tried to understand. And in those desolate moments, I wished I was kid again. I felt like I can't deal with grown up problems anymore. But those unhappy days didn't mean I have no friends from school or at home. I have. Lots actually. And yet I still felt lonely sometimes. However, it was because of the love of my family and friends have I learned to appreciate life and myself. I got up again and tried to correct my mistakes. It wasn't easy, but I was able to surpass them all. I believe I am a better person now than I am before. I have gained confidence and have learned a lot from my past experiences. I successfully finished my studies, and I have a nice job in a big company. I have a supportive family, loving friends and of course, God. I wouldn't be where I am today if not for them. I have never been thankful and happier. Robert Frost once said, 'The best way out is always through.' My life's been one hell of a ride, and I'm proud to say that no matter how many turns and rough roads I have gone through, I never stopped. It was all worth it. I know there's so much more out there waiting for me. I can't wait to find out.

#Personal